Sometimes the feelings are so overwhelmingly(?) strong. It seems like the longer I go without being with another woman the stronger the desires get.........
It has been several years, and to be honest the gal I was with I wasn't really that attracted to as much as we just got really close as friends and I found out that she was not just interested in other women, but interested in me. It was ok, but I really think it can and would be even better with someone I really "clicked" with and was attracted to.
My husband is very understanding and supportive; and I know it would be alright with him. I would really, really like to have him and another woman (I know he would be ok with it).
I know there are a lot of places online/etc. to meet others (for sex), but I am not really the one nighter type. I really want more of a friends with benefits type of situation. (Someone that I can spend time in and out of the bedroom with).
B

 HI- Just a quick note- I am still here; just having a lot going on at home right now. I haven't had much time to be on the computer (I need to find/make the time to go through my thoughts and this actually seems/feels like the best and most helpful way to do that. I am promising myself that I will find time in the next couple days (by Wed. night at the latest) to do that. Putting my feelings/ thoughts down here seems to at least give me a way to "vent" (not sure if that is the right word)/ sort things out.
Well- I do need to go for now- Hope everyone is doing great.
B

Sometimes I just wish I could disappear (just for a while). Not have to be someone's mother/ wife/ whatever; just be me for a while.
To be able to just turn off that part of me and not have to worry about my kids/ my husband/ money matters/car problems/so much stress. I wish I could just shut my brain off sometimes, just for a while (to sort of recharge).
I have always had problems with stress (but then who doesn't). It was always drilled into me (mainly by my mother) that "you're stupid", "you'll never have anything" or "anyone who really cares"; etc. When my mother found out about my being raped (late teens), she all but called me a whore (because she didn't talk that way). My father was always my rock. You know how after you hear something just so much you can start believing it. Well that was a long time ago, but you know it took me a lot of years and some real friends (including my now husband) to believe the truth--I am a good person. I am not always the smartest card in the deck (no personal insult intended), but I am not stupid, I am not ugly and I have some very real/close friends (and am making more all the time). I had always had (more often than not) those type of "friends" that stab you in the back and put you down when you are out of ear shot.  

On a lighter note------
My husband teases me about being "high maintenance" and says I "only have one thing on my mind all the time". That isn't totally false, but not entirely true either. OK- so I really like sex (not just intercourse), I am such a romantic; you know the whole cuddling/ fondling/etc. kind of stuff (I'm going blank on some of my terminology). But what is wrong with that?............ .